Dive into the archives.
- #9156
“After a week like this I’m glad I don’t have a drinking problem.”
- #9149
Producer on the phone with her Grandma: “No Grandma, I’m not drunk, I’m at work.”
- #9148
First-year reporter at a major metro: “It’s more like the college paper than I thought it’d be.”
- #9146
Editor 1: “Why would you want to wear bacon cologne? To attract flocks of fat people?” Editor 2: “You’d never be cold in the winter.”
- #9143
Following a spirited newsroom discussion: “Dude, you were just yelled at by a woman wearing Hello Kitty earrings.”
- #9142
Ad designer: “I would never put down your so-called religion.”
- #9132
Producer, talking about torrential downpours: “It’s only appropriate we get nine-and-a-half inches on Ron Jeremy’s birthday.”
- #9130
Reporter on the phone: “I’ve never been so excited about mustaches in my entire life.”
- #9127
Reporter after police scanner begins emitting a loud siren noise: “I WON!”
- #9125
Extremely southern city editor upon getting off the phone with source: “Well, somebody’s done stole the judge’s car.”
- #9123
Food editor after trying a new soda: “You know what this reminds me of? When I spray hairspray in my mouth.”
- #9122
Editor: “You’re crazy for writing this story. Lucky for you, I’m crazier so I’ll publish it.”
- #9112
Reporter: “I’m so jealous! What jail did you guys go to?”
- #9110
Reporter: “It’s mildly disturbing when you overhear the editor storming through the newsroom, shouting ‘destroy their morale.’” Editor: “I did not say that. I said ‘Crush their spirit; destroy their morale.’”
- #9109
Editor to reporter with a cold: “You could have your own 1-900 number with that voice.”
- #9106
Editor who happens to be black: “Why are you asking me about the Black History Month parade?” Reporter: “Because you’re the editor for tomorrow.” Editor: “Good answer.”
- #9105
Assistant Editor: “I have textual changes for you.” Designer: “You should write a song called ‘Textual Healing.’”
- #9103
“PR people should never use the word ‘climax’ in anything.”
- #9100
Entertainment editor: “Justin Bieber is 18 tomorrow. Ladies and gay men, he’s legal!”
- #9099
One reporter to another while figuring out the copy machine: “I don’t need to be smart, I’m on TV.”
