Dive into the archives.
- #9280
Traffic reporter, to the morning anchor’s toddler: “I know you! I’ve seen you on Twitter.”
- #9278
Editor: “I’m celebrating Mother’s Day. I don’t have children, but I have reporters.”
- #9267
Senior reporter to young female reporter: “I wonder if I can find a way to use my newfound Twitter superpowers to help get you a nice husband.”
- #9217
Editor: “Is today ‘Take your kid to work day’? I would have brought my cat.”
- #9186
“I get excited when my dad accidentally writes in AP Style.”
- #9149
Producer on the phone with her Grandma: “No Grandma, I’m not drunk, I’m at work.”
- #9093
Reporter talking to a source after-hours on Valentine’s Day: “Sorry I interrupted your date, I forget other people have lives sometimes.”
- #9087
Reporter looking at Pinterest: “Babies are cute. I can see why people have them.”
- #9029
Anchor to cameraman’s young son: “Are you going on a drug raid with daddy today?”
- #9021
Veteran features writer on his 21-year-old son: “Still, he doesn’t pee in the washing machine anymore so that’s an improvement.”
- #8919
Reporter 1 to Reporter 2 on Christmas: “Have a nice time with your family. If you stab anyone, call us so we can get a photographer out there.”
- #8892
Male sports editor to receptionist’s child: “You are the reason I am not having kids.” Child, without missing a beat: “Boys don’t have kids.”
- #8818
Editor: “I’m pretty sure my mom is scared I’m going to die alone, but she’s totally wrong… I have cats and books.”
- #8778
Reporter going to spend the weekend with her boyfriend: “I’m going to be good this weekend.” Weekend Editor: “That’s not much fun.” Reporter: “I didn’t say what I was going to be good at.”
- #8754
Reporter in editorial meeting: “And it’s my week to write the column. Since Thanksgiving is coming, I figure I’ll write about thankfulness, or some other such fiction.”
- #8752
Reporter 1: “I guess we can expect to start seeing good work from Jess again. Her boyfriend dumped her last night.” Reporter 2: “Yeah, she’ll dedicate herself to journalism again… until she meets the next guy.”
- #8723
“You know you’ve had too many kids if AP style says you should write out the number, not spell it.”
- #8696
Reporter on phone with wife: “I know. I’m sorry. A police officer got arrested for DWI.”
- #8679
Copy editor, listening to scanner: “They can suspend your license for not paying child support?” Photographer whose girlfriend is pregnant: “Ah, something to look forward to.”
- #8657
Retiring editor: “If I can leave you with one lesson it’s: Marry. Outside. Of. The. Newsroom.” Reporter: “That’s hard to do when we never get out of here.”
