Dive into the archives.
- 1676
Hefty Photographer to Executive Producer: “I don’t run [after people]. That’s what zoom is for.”
- 1675
Reporter commenting on the largest industry in town: “If you’re the only whore in town, you don’t have to shave your legs.”
- 1674
City Editor to no one in particular: “I want to take a freaking flying leap off the damn building!” Managing Editor: “Not until I go first.”
- 1673
Editor, after circulation meeting: “At this point, I’m just going to start running old Backstreet Boy’s lyrics. No one would notice.”
- 1672
Elderly subscriber with an ancient voice, calling about a subscription: “How much longer do I have?”
- 1671
Copy editor under stress: “I’m sorry, I can’t lower my standards enough to work any faster.”
- 1670
Reporter 1: “You know what I want for Christmas?” Reporter 2: “A society that respects journalists?” Reporter 1: “Well, if you believe in Santa Claus, I guess anything’s possible.”
- 1669
Reporter to no one in particular after filling out a 40-hour timecard for a 60-hour week without overtime: “This is the biggest piece of fiction we never print all week.”
- 1668
Young new anchor says out loud: “They really don’t expect me to say LOVE CANAL on the air do they?”
- 1667
Night editor: “We’re journalists, not grief counselors.”
- 1666
Caring reporter to stressed editor: “I want to give you a hug, but I think you might bite me.”
- 1665
After a young baby cried somewhere in the distance: “An editor’s just been told they’re being laid off.”
- 1664
Talking about a possible story for a freelancer: Reporter 1: “She can’t write it in her normal tone. She would have to make it… ” Reporter 2: “Fact-based?” Reporter 1: “I was going to say useful, but that works, too.”
- 1663
Frustrated reporter on the phone: “I’m working on this nonexistent story, which I’m writing in the subjunctive.”
- 1662
Reporter: “They are calling off the search and rescue effort for the crab fisherman.” Editor: “Sometimes you eat the crab, sometimes the crab eats you.”
- 1661
Reporter following public hearing: “There were Amish people there and they were angry. You’ve got to be a real asshole to make Amish people angry.”
- 1660
Assignment Editor to Newsroom: “The fire station is on fire.” Radio editor: “How many alarms is that?”
- 1659
Reporter speaking to his city editor: “Don’t worry, every time I step out that door, my only concern is not getting stabbed.”
- 1658
Wine/food writer: “This is the kind of wine you can open first thing in the morning and sip all day long.”
- 1657
Reporter: “Why did you go into journalism?” Coworker: “To report the goddamn news. What a quaint idea.”
