Dive into the archives.
- 334
“If anyone steals my pen, I’m gonna have to choke a bitch.”
- 333
Editor to production manager on Sex Supplement art choice:
“One penis is enough for my newspaper.”
- 332
“Twas a simpler time… when He-Man was the master of the universe”
- 331
“Journalism is 95 percent sitting on your ass typing crap.”
- 330
“I hope after 3 p.m. I’m still here”
- 329
“Can your dead hooker take 12 inches?”
- 328
“I guess the good thing about this year, 1/12th of it is over.”
- 327
“We usually try to put a verb in a headline.”
Supervising editor to city reporter
- 326
“How is that what she said?”
- 325
“No, he had a service dog, not a service lion!”
- 324
New AE: “Oh! I don’t want to invite all employees, do I?”
Sales 1: “Well you can, but I will tell you now, I won’t be there!”
New AE: “I don’t think all those people can fit into that little room.”
Sales 1: “All those people crammed in there…”
New AE: “Well, free cake!”
Sales 2: “I’m free now!”
Sales 1: [...]
- 323
While discussing sex of statue
“We have a vagina”
- 322
“Dead kids don’t need toys.”
- 321
My newspaper-editor roommate leaving the house:
“I’m going to Starbucks. I mean work.”
- 320
“I will make you some kettle corn if you want some.”
“Will you feed it to me?”
- 319
Managing Editor to Editor:
“Dave, we have raped the AP and there is nothing left.”
- 318
“Is it wrong to run the over-eating for fun column under the grocery shopping on welfare story?”
- 317
Publisher asks staff to gather for a ‘short & quick meeting’.
Circulation mgr: “I’ve been going short & quick all day… ”
Publisher: “So I hear.”
- 316
Reporter to Noon Producer:
“Everything I say to you is now off the record. Even if I’m going to McDonald’s, it’s off the record.”
- 315
Advice to newbie from veteran copy editor:
“I’m going to hell anyway. I determined that 40 years ago. Always determine that early.”
